When the sun goes down


or maybe just once,
all the colors of the world dissapear,
and you sink in to the deep
where there is no light

You sit on the bottom of the cave
and can’t fall deeper,
but can’t climb – you’re completely stuck

I don’t know what is worse,
but all I know is
that even if you’re on the bottom of the cave

and when the sun goes down
it does come up again
even if you can not bear the light.


Unplugged: my life


Dust on the floor and a ray of light on a place
that’s hidden from the dark
On my wooden floor.

I see the switch, I see the connection point
but yet all I can

staring pointless at the wall.

This, sometimes, and deeply
is my life.

It’s not dark enough


A brand new day. A sun shines, and it shines in every corner. There is no darkness. There is no place to run or hide, because the light reaches everything. No matter what I do, how deep I crawl, I can’t hide myself from this “outside” world. You can’t run and you can’t hide – keeps repeating in my head, even if it’s not a voice that speaks. I can see those words literally flash by in my mind.I see the words. They don’t leave me alone.

There are these days, that the light is so bright, that the world seems unbearable. That you just want to crawl away, into darkness, just because it gives you space to breathe. Breathe, and rest, that you can’t get in the light. And even your sunglasses do not help you at all. The light just comes through. No matter what you do, no matter how deep the cave is where you hide, you stay visible.

Sometimes all you want is stay in the darkness, let the world pass and crawl away, just to get some rest.


You don’t even belong here.

Through the curtain that I since recently never completely close, shines a glimpse of light. Yesterday the moon shined in, today it’s the sun.With my left arm I open the curtain a bit further, so I can see the Pinus sylvestris tree that is standing in front of my window. Poor tree, you don’t even belong here, crosses my mind.

Outside, the world looks perfectly. What could be wrong, with this world, is what an outsider would probably think. Maybe even I would think the same, if I didn’t knew better.

Unexpected love


It’s crazy how things sometimes go –

things you stopped believing in

can become truth before you know.

A dark and empty heart, notices a little light in the distance,

coming closer, slowly sparkles of light

touching it

in this world of completely lost.


One dark heart,

has sensed some light

And gathered again some power,

to choose, for the fight.