Bang. I closed the door a bit too loud. The car shook for a few seconds. Am I really ready? I asked myself. But since I was the only person to answer, there was no reply unless I would talk to myself.
Closing doors, turn on the engine and move. I imagined it was almost like I was in a space capsule. Sometimes I dreamed about space; to be able to fly away far from the earth, through the troposphere to the stratosphere, where I would be able to meet this weird point between the pitch black surroundings and the view to the earth – somehow it was in my mind that here is the border. And then to the mesosphere to somewhere in the thermosphere; that is where space would be for me, where it would be all black and far enough. There is somewhere this sphere called exosphere, but I didn’t really understand what this was so I tried to remove this from my memories; too much unknown. All I wanted, was to experience the travelling through these spheres, and have all the views most people would never have. I can’t exactly explain why I sometimes wish that, maybe it’s because I need to see things in broader perspectives to be able to understand. Maybe, I think I can understand life if I can see it from above.
But chances are big, I will have to live with this unanswered question for the rest of my life.