Trying

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Since one or two weeks (I’m bad with remembering times and such), I am trying to work according ‘the plan’ (I made a while ago). And surprisingly I must say, even with the ‘bad’ moments, I am doing quite well so far (at least, I think). Since the start I managed to go on walks at least 2 times a week, but so far I went 3 times each week untill now – well okay, today I made my second walk, but I plan to go tomorrow again. Sometimes the walk is shorter, sometimes longer, but at least it’s a 30 minutes walk.

This morning was quite okay as well I guess- I did another job application. At some kind of special burgers place (no mcD or BK, this is for quality burgers and with pure and organic ingredients.). Of course I’m not the perfect person for this job – like for nothing. But I think it could be a nice job, and it’s parttime, which would be nice too. (At this moment, I am not sure if I could handle fulltime job). I wrote the application quite fast, and I was quite satisfied with the result too – not about everything, but I can always find something that is not perfect or that I’m not satisfied with – and even if I was doubting about how to say something, I just thought, okay, what the heck, I will send it out. If this little thing means the difference between having the job or not (which of course, could be a reason), then it’s not my job.So it’s send.

As well, I already made my walk today, and now I have a full afternoon left. And I’m not sure what to do. Before these things took me hours, and easily I ended up a whole day busy with it. Now, it went a lot faster, and I feel a bit locked up and surrounded by emptiness.

I’m not sure if I can manage more jobsearching and applications today. So I will try to find something else to occupy myself with. Tonight it’s Jiu Jitsu night, so for the evening I don’t have to worry. Strange and unfair how things are balanced (or not) sometimes, some people crave for freetime, others have so much that it almost kills them in a certain way.

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