Take the leap of faith

So. I got turned down for another job. Really, I’m really getting sick of this. The constant being turned down. It was a job for which I had experience (which is rare usually) and which I am sure I can do. I also seemed to fit in the profile they gave, but of course, they had other candidates who fit better in their profile, so that’s (like always) the reason (at least they write that to me), that my application ends here.

Finally I had the strenght back to search for a job again and apply for things lately, but it doesn’t work at all. It’s really affecting me, and I try not to let it affect me. Say a year ago, these things really affected my mood. Luckily, they don’t really affect it now like they did before, and I hope it stays like this. It’s not cool that I can’t find a job, or that no one wants me, it doesn’t help for the confidence in myself or the feeling of having a right to exist.

I try to keep myself okay, even without money, I survive so far.

The more and more I can dream again, the more I realize I do have dreams. I dream of the outdoors, of hiking in the mountains, of doing adventure races, and things like that. But I’m not in shape, and I didn’t do these things much. Though I know I love them and I would be more happy to do these things actively – I miss the mountains. I miss the outdoor life. There are no mountains here, where I currently stay.

The more and more I think moving next year is a right thing to do. Even if I don’t have a job. I don’t expect to find one very soon when I will go there. Though I hope I will.

I need to do this. I need to make this move. I need to go abroad. I need to follow my heart, and find and chase my dreams. (And yeah, of course, I’m afraid – I feel (again) this is my ‘real last chance’. – If this doesn’t work out….no, i don’t want to think about that.).


4 thoughts on “Take the leap of faith

  1. It’s better that you’re young and you get rejected now, learn from it and grow. What often stands between you and a job are other equally qualified candidates. When that happens, you better hope the hiring manager or boss likes you. A lot. Like I said to someone else, there’s not much you can do about that but just keep swimming.

    And on your dreams: keep pursuing them. Before you realize it’s too late, take a chance. Go for a hike one day, but start simple. Go for a walk in the park. Every journey begins with a step.

    • Thank you for your reply.
      Ever since I graduated and left university, (2,5 years ago now) all my applications ended like this. (As well applications not related to my degree.) To be honest: I never even had one interview; everything ended before that. It’s really frustrating and it’s just making you doubt about yourself and your capacities. ( And I’m not that young anymore; I passed the 30 now )

      I’m trying very hard to chase and find my dreams. This year, I took risks, turned my whole life upside down, but it failed. Now I’m back, in a similar position as before, just with less money. And that’s what will become the next problem for the next ‘finding and trying to make life work and my dreams’: I will run out of money in a while .I know money isn’t everything, but with no money at all and another fail, I will end up at the street or I will be completely dependent on other people – none of those, I wish for. (this is what I’m a bit afraid of).

  2. I think getting rejected on a regular basis makes us ALL doubt ourselves. It has been over a year since I’ve graduated – made it to the interview stages, always had a contract fall through or they found someone better. As for being 30, you are only as old as you feel.

    I’m glad to hear that you did take that chance, although it didn’t go as planned. But if you hadn’t taken it, you would never know. Money sure isn’t everything, but it is an important part of urbanization. Anyone that says money isn’t important should try living without it for a month.

    Anyway, I wish you all the best with your money, dreams, career, peers and health.

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