I need to make this life , work.

Reason. Purpose. Goals. Dreams. Wishes. Priorities. Motivation. Hope.

Last night, I came across this video : Every runner has a reason

A while ago, I came across these ‘motivational speech’ video(s) ( a few: video video 2 video 3 ).  There are loads more to find, I just mention a few here, random chosen.

If you want something enough, if you try hard enough, if you work hard enough, you will make it (?)

If you never give up on your dreams, if you keep following your heart, if you work hard enough, you will make it (?)

If you push yourself, if you keep on going, if you keep motivated you will make it (?).

So many stories to find of people who were in a sh*tty situation. So many got out and bling bling boom (this; doesnt mean I think they don’t worked hard for it!) – they made it. There they stand. The examples.

What’s the purpose of all of this? There are people, who are never going to make it. There are people , who just can not. No matter how hard they try, how hard they work, things aren’t working with them. If I see these videos, I’m truly happy for these people who made it so far, who came out of these sad situations, and they found a way to move on.

But at the same time, these videos make me feel awful. Awful about myself, that I can’t make it, that I can’t work hard anymore, that I can’t find the motivation, that I , lost my energy and trust in myself and don’t know who I am, where I fit, how I can make life work.

I don’t know. I don’t see it anymore. I have maps, a compass, books. But I can’t see it. My vision has blurred, even if I can still see clearly.

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