Tattooed inside my brain
Been trying to erase some parts,
but sometimes I can’t seem to bear
these thoughts about you
can’t bear to read
or see something
that reminds me of you
These memories – sometimes almost killing me.
Once things were different
We used to talk, we used to speak
We used to write, but time turned weak
well, not only time, things changed
And they will never be, the same
(but I don’t want them to be)
The impact you had on me
in several ways
is drifting away
but memories come back at certain days.
I realize that
I never really knew you after all
and maybe we were never even really friends
since it was hidden behind this hole with walls
The more I used to think about it
The more confusing it would be
But distance changes things
And feelings always block the things to see.
Sometimes I feel bad
that I decided to cut the contact.
And try to erase you out of my life
but then again
True, it’s maybe not fair that I made it one way
but I guess the contact was one sided anyway
because you would decide
when and how and what and…
oh well, maybe it doesn’t really matter anymore.
Guess I’ll never really understand
but you maybe wouldn’t say.
The inside cracks lost hope and sense it all
where little time turns into days.