Midnight run

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Another sleepless night coming up. And so I found myself on my balcony again, on a warm evening, turning into a night, watching the sky, watching the stars, watching the world go dark. 2 am. Still no signs of sleep. And no signs of civilization. Somehow I felt strong.

Earlier I had a very short (digital) conversation with someone who touches something in me. I don’t know that person very well, but once, when we just met,  we had a deep conversation. I felt connection. I felt understood. This was a person who experienced similar troubles, difficulties, disconnection, and so on. That person was really open to me somehow. I don’t know why. But somehow, I feel a lot of respect for that person. I wish I could talk more, to that person. But this person, is far away and will probably never be close. It has something that makes me very sad, but also something that is beautiful as well – I should be grateful that I met that person right? that I had an opportunity to talk with that person. Something about it makes me feel really sad.  But for now, this (short) conversation made me feel good when I recalled it in my mind.

Anyway, even if I cycled earlier on the day for a few hours with these mountains that normally exhaust my legs, my legs felt strong this time. For a moment, I felt strong. And I took my running shoes, and went for a midnight run.

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2 thoughts on “Midnight run

  1. When a person is close in the heart but far away in the space, we often have an alternation of emotions. And this alternation can be more violent when our perception of the world is lacking of colors, like maybe it’s ours.
    If you are colorblind, after a little of time don’t see some colors is a something that you accept. But if you can see them again for a brief moment, that happy moment could become your torment.
    Because if it has happened once..why can’t it happens again?

    I don’t know how you could run during the night, but surely it was fantastic. And crazy!

    • It can happen. But it has something sad that it somehow always turns out so far away or impossible. Somehow I have to think about this quote from a book I recently read (The Blind Assassin) a lot: ‘I’m not sure which is worse: intense feeling, or the absence of it.

      I don’t know either about that nightly run, it was the first time I did that. The temperature is good in the night (in the day except the early morning, it’s too warm for that for me). Also the absence of people is nice – at least no one sees me struggling while I’m running.

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